Playing with paraprosdokians

What is a paraprosdokian?

Paraprosdokians have been around for decades, but the word has not. It’s such a new word that you’d be hard-pressed to find it in any standard dictionaries yet. The word fittingly comes from the Greek word para, meaning “beyond” and prosdokia, meaning “expectation.” And that’s exactly what it is: a phrase that unexpectedly goes beyond your expectations. The right twist forces your audience to rethink the sentence, making it both clever and memorable.

For example, this well-known paraprosdokian puts a spin on the rule of three set up the audience expects: “There are three types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can’t.” As readers, we’re taken on a rollercoaster of expectations. First, we expect a list of three types of people, then we are hit with a different common phrase, “Those who can and those who can’t.” Put them together, and the sentence insinuates that the speaker cannot count.

Write with Confidence using Editor

Elevate your writing with real-time, intelligent assistance

Learn more

Comedians use them all the time in their work—oftentimes playing around with literal and figurative language. For example, Phyllis Diller masterfully used paraprosdokians like, “Housework can’t kill you, but why take the chance?” and “I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.”

While most people associate paraprosdokians with comedic one-liners, some use it for dramatic effect instead. For example, Winston Churchill used paraprosdokians often in politics with inspirational quips like, “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong,” and, “If you are going through hell, keep going.”

Comedians and public figures have a blast with paraprosdokians, so you should too. Check out these hilarious examples to inspire you in your own work.

Examples of paraprosdokians by comedians

“When I was growing up, I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.” – Lily Tomlin

“I was born in 1962. And the room next to me was 1963.” – Joan Rivers

“When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.” – Erma Bombeck

“On the other hand, you have different fingers.” – Steven Wright

“I wish I could play little league now. I’d be way better than before.” – Mitch Hedburg

“I’m sick of following my dreams. I’m just going to ask them where they’re goin’ and hook up with them later.” – Mitch Hedburg

“One tequile, two tequila, three tequila, floor.” – George Carlin

Examples of paraprosdokians by public figures

“If I had two faces, would I be wearing this one?” – Abraham Lincoln, after being accused of being two-faced
“Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints on your heart.” – Eleanor Roosevelt
“Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.” – Mae West
“To err is human, but it feels divine. – Mae West
“He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce, I keep the house.” – Zsa Zsa Gabore
“When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.” – Cathy Guisewite

“The first thing I do is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.” – Oscar Levant

“I have the heart of a small boy – in a glass jar on my desk” – Stephen King

Examples of paraprosdokians in literature

“Any child who cannot do long division by himself does not deserve to smoke.” – Digital Clocks and Pocket Calculators: Spoilers of Youth by Fran Lebowitz

“I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.” ― The Salmon of Doubt by Douglas Adams

“By the time you swear you’re his,
Shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is
Infinite, undying—
Lady, make a note of this:
One of you is lying.”

― Unfortunate Coincidence by Dorothy Parker

Use paraprosdokians in your own writing

Use paraprosdokians to add some wit to your comedy sketch, speech, essay, novel, poem—whatever you’re writing. Sometimes they just come naturally, especially after familiarizing yourself with artists who use them a lot like Phyllis Diller or Mitch Hedburg. Other times you must work at it a bit harder through brainstorming exercises. Play around with AI to pull you out of writer’s block. To play around paraprosdokians yourself, pick a well-known phrase with an expected ending and turn that expectation on its head.